Feeling lost in the numerous possibilities of what i could be doing.
The constant injunctions to quit your 9-to-5 job, go travel, live your life debt-free, single, and embrace Carpe Diem!
Feeling like everyone else has life figured out?
But when we look closer—beneath the surface of every life is a shared struggle.
I remember meeting this beautiful lady at a wedding in the south of Spain. She was a journalist for a famous newspaper El Diario de Madrid and was wearing a stunning dress—the kind that is tight at the waist, flares out, and stops just below the knees. She looked absolutely gorgeous.
Passionate about social justice, she covered events and conducted investigations into the hidden aspects of inequality and violence in the Spanish capital.
Her boyfriend, a young and handsome lawyer, exuding confidence. He had Italian origins, and he played on them a lot. Speaking with hands, making loud jokes. His name was Joe.
And he truly looked like one of those lawyers defending Italian mobsters—the kind no one wants to represent, where bribes and scheming reign supreme. He was, obviously, wearing a stunning suit and had a designer watch on his wrist, impossible to miss, specially when he was agitating his hands talking like italians do.
They really looked like the perfect couple that ANYBODY could envy. LOL
Later on, (after a few drinks and some very intrusive questions from me, haha), I learned that Joe had Moroccan roots and that “Joe” was actually short for Jamil!
He was drowning in debt, a court-appointed lawyer, and his clients were indeed petty criminals—broke, small-time thugs…
The lady told me that she was horribly complexed by her legs ! She tried to explain me what was wrong with her legs, to be honest I still don’t get it (I think it was a problem of lengths or shape? or she hated her feet… ) I don’t remember… what I remember is that her complexe was so big that she avoided all her life to go to the beach or any other situation where we can see her legs, and that beautiful dress she was wearing was MADE perfectly to hide the parts she hates the most… I was like wow… I would have never imagined such a struggle behind the beautiful image !
Joe was pathologically jealous of his girlfriend, and the atmosphere at home was nothing but arguments and money problems. She was paying most of the rent and expenses while he was out playing the field.
Gosh… I remembered telling to myself GODAMIT, that couple is TOXIC AF, yet, no body could imagine the struggle.
What I want to tell with this story is that having a sincere opinion about your own life, without comparing yourself to others, is truly the beginning of a better life.
We are always, eternally, searching for a better life—that’s just what we do! We may be grateful for what we have now, yet we still want more, something better. It’s human nature.
But having a personal idea of what this “more” means is so important. Whether it’s more freedom, more money, better health, children, success, love—whatever we desire—it must be envisioned without any comparison.
This COMPARISON is the motherf**** THIEF OF JOY.
If I compare myself to that couple in that wedding, my life seems like shit ! But when you dig, my life was much better than theirs, for sure. BUT if THEY dig, they might find that MY LIFE is shit, and their is much better.
BECAUSE WE ARE ALL WORK IN PROGRESS. Their life might change for the better, so mine could. So let’s just not compare ourselves.